Nanny Trial

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I told her that my goal for Fridays, spending them with my son while I’m gone at private practice, was for him to feel loved and cared for and that the structure of the day can be free flowing, as he is in ‘school’ the rest of the week, which is a very structured setting.

And I came home to find her handwritten note, and the dishes put in the dishwasher, and a little Christmas ornament made.

All of my initial fears of her being flaky have yet to come true. She was 5 minutes early, very communicative, and had a cheerful disposition at the end. I am hopeful that she will be the nanny we can keep for awhile while I get to explore whether private practice is a good fit for me or not.

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Super Family

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This year’s theme revolved around Potamus’ love of all things super hero related. We had Wonder Mom, Bat Dad, and Spider Kid. Pretty epic. He fell asleep halfway around our neighborhood loop. I had to carry him asleep on my shoulder with his heavy sack of treats dangling from his grubby little fists.

He now keeps saying “chocolate,” and “costume,” and I get the two confused because he can’t quite enunciate well enough yet. At any rate, we had a fun Halloween, and hope you all did too!

Fall Bike Rides

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The best part about trolling the thrift stores weekly is coming across a gently used Radio Flyer trike for $14. Potamus is in heaven, and we’ve even bent the ‘no bikes inside’ rule for him. The hardwood floors might get banged up a bit, but it’s really cute to see how much he loves his new mode of transportation. Scooting down the long hallway, sitting in the living room eating a snack and watching his show, I’m happy we found such a good one for him!

And then I look at this picture and see how quickly time goes by. How the days ARE long and the years ARE short and think in just a mere two months he’ll be 3. And my anxious mind spirals into all the what-ifs about trying for another or staying one-and-done, and it doesn’t help that some facebook friends have ‘come out’ as one-and-done parents and I begin to be envious of anyone who can clearly make up their mind about anything parenting related. I love this little boy, and how he still snuggles in to my body, especially when he’s sick. I love that daycare teaches him to be polite, saying ‘okay mommy,’ and ‘thank you mommy,’ because Lord knows if he was in my care 24/7 he’d know how to say ‘this fucking_________’ because I can’t seem to control my potty mouth.

I’m thankful for the calm fall weather, and bike rides around the neighborhood, and that life is good in moments even when it’s hard in others.

Water Loving Genes

When I was a young kid, I was OBSESSED with the water. I mean, obsessed. Like, I wanted to be in the water so badly that my mom gave up trying to control this urge, and let me plunge fully into any body of water over 2 inches deep…in my dresses. Because I was also a super girly tomboy who climbed trees and wore dresses EVERY DAY until I was in 4th grade. 

One of my favorite memories was going to a park with some friends, and normally this wading pool (shaped like an Orca) was dried up (because it wasn’t summertime), but this one time it was FULL OF WATER and I went full on swimming, in a pale yellow dress with puffy sleeves. Pretty sure parenting me was like trying to  stop a rushing river. 

At any rate, I’ve noticed a similar trend with Potamus. He shouts “water!” whenever he sees a body of water, and the other day I had to drag him away from running headlong into Lake Washington. And we had plans that didn’t involve soggy clothes, so I had to say ‘no,’ which resulted in a meltdown of epic proportions. 

It makes me wonder if a preference for swimming, or being around water, is a genetic preference, or just a being-a-kid thing. Because he’s seriously obsessed. Except with showers. He’s not a fan of showers. 

A Picture’s Worth 1,000 memories

look at THAT FACE!

look at THAT FACE!

Having a toddler is much harder than having an infant, especially in the picture taking department. I take so many more photos that have a distinct blur from his movements. Though I’ve just now figured out that he will say “cheese” for photos and will result in a sorta smile on his end.

Big Toy

But we were out in the park the other night, to eat pizza and Doritos with friends, and to enjoy the Seattle sunshine. I managed to capture a few photos that really capture his personality. Like his fearlessness, as he launched himself off the platform and then hung there on the bars. I was far enough away to not be a helicopter parent, but was keeping a keen eye on him. I managed enough time to take this picture, mostly to teach him that sometimes being a daredevil means not getting rescued right away 🙂 He was no worse for wear, despite the side-eye I was getting from some lame brained parents who hover ridiculously around their offspring.

Mischevious

 

He’s a good eater, for everyone but me. Friend Mari brought raspberries, and he gobbled them up. I buy raspberries and he looks like I’m making him eat poop laced garbage.

his expressions are priceless

his expressions are priceless

There really are no words for this last one. His expression is just hilarious here. I’m not sure exactly what he’s trying to tell me…

Take Time to Stack Rocks

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With an hour to kill before dinner plans, Potamus and I took advantage of the Seattle sunshine to get out for a walk. There’s this housing development one street over, and at the end of the cul de sac is a drainage pond where some ducks congregate. Potamus loves the ducks, and got really excited when we headed in that direction. He kept shouting “duck! duck!” (which actually sounds more like ‘duh! duh!’).

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Halfway down the block we came across a pile of rocks. Fascinated, Potamus spent the next 20 minutes stacking and unstacking rocks. And I let him. This rock stacking is actually a zen practice that you can google (and see amazing pictures) from around the world. But it was hard for me to stop and just feel the sunshine on my shoulders. I kept thinking ‘but, we’re on a walk, to see ducks,” because that’s my personality…goal oriented (mostly) and not always about the journey.

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I’m trying to slow down. Because when depression and anxiety ramp up in my life I usually try to fill myself up with a lot of things that actually numb me out. And so instead of focusing on the ducks and whether he’d be disappointed if we had to turn around for dinner after only walking 100 feet to the rock stack, I let myself be in the moment. There was nothing more exciting for him than that moment. He was right where he needed to be. I was right where I needed to be.

Take some time today to stack the rocks my friends.