To Apply or Not to Apply, That is the Question


I’m taking a break, at work, from working on my cover letter and resume. I hadn’t anticipated that 6 months into my new job, I would be considering changing positions. After all, this was the job that I had specifically requested the Universe provide for me: 20-30 hours a week, flexible, teaching AND advising/counseling at a College. I mostly really enjoy my job, though there’s some passive aggressive communication that happens in our very tiny department, I mostly log my hours, teach my classes and go home…to where I am spending a lot of my time with Potamus, playing and having fun. I work 32 hours a week, Monday-Thursday, and have three day weekends every week. Or four days if it falls on a holiday like President’s Day!

So why am I considering another position? Well, it’s full-time (35 hours a week), tenure track Faculty Counselor. More $$. More security (after tenure). More Counseling. And my friend/graduate school peer would be my director. She’s motivated, driven, and inspirational. The program is not robust right now, and I could be on the cutting edge in making it into a thriving counseling department. The downsides is that it is more hours and less teaching. But, it’s what I actually went to school for (college counseling), and the pay is pretty darn good.

I feel torn. My mind flops back and forth on whether to apply. Many tell me “what’s the harm in applying?” But, by applying, I am showing that I am looking for other things, that I do not want to settle in to this job for the long-haul. Though that’s not entirely the case, because I do see myself here for another year or two before I would feel stifled. Part of me feels like not applying sells myself short, and that I deserve to be challenged and promoted, because I have a strong work-ethic and like a team environment where I feel challenged toward doing better, being better.

The reason to stay in my current job, is that I’ve only been here 6 months (5 months, truly, because of Winter Break), and feel that I owe myself and the position some time to get settled in and really shape how I want it to go. Right now, though, I know I could do this job through the end of next school year without much problem. And I LOVE the teaching portion, but the adivising portion is less than stellar. Though I also know that without much guidance or focus I tend to slip into madly-pinning-on-Pinterest. I’m not good at making myself busy when I don’t have to be. I could see myself sliding into a sort of humdrum complacency, which usually makes me irritable.

Sigh.

I hate this feeling.

I know that applying wouldn’t guarantee me the job. It’s a hot ticket item in this economy, but I do know that I’d have a better shot at it because I’m already in the system. If I did get it, I’m sure I would love that job, too. It’d be different than what I’m doing, but still probably fulfilling. It would just be different. And I’d be making more $, and more security. But I’d also be working more, which would mean less time with Potamus. But not THAT much less time, since it’s only 3 hours a week more.

So…should I apply? Or not?

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2 Comments

  1. My favorite quote for life or business matters: “If you are going to fail, fail as fast as possible.” This allows you to move on sooner and invest your energy into something with more potential. In lieu of “the sinking ship.”

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