For Now

I’ve been struggling lately, with work and motherhood and wifedom and simply being in my own skin. My bestie and I have a standing phone date weekly (yeah, for the last SEVEN years, whoa!) and her wisdom always punches me in my gut.

I had been complaining about my lack of sleep, as Potamus is doing this funny thing where he sleeps, and then doesn’t want to sleep…for like 2 or 3 hours…and while that’s hard during the day, its really lucky at night…especially since I work the next day. We sleep in shifts and my patience for everything is worn thin.

And she said, “for now.”

A few years ago we learned the word AND, with things like “I love him AND I am hurt by him.” This little word has helped save my life. And now I can add the phrase “for now,” to this way of life. She said, “you are tired…for now. He is sleeping poorly, for now.” It acknowledges the frustration and weariness, with the understanding that this life is full of fluctuations.

And sure enough, just when I thought I couldn’t take it any more, Potamus slept well last night.

For now.